Haunted

I don’t want to be haunted by the past

By your harmful words and actions

Although you see no wrong

You expect forgiveness all the same

I should just let everything go

We are family, we share the same blood

I wouldn’t take a bullet for a friend who has done me this way

Why should I allow you another chance to aim?

I am wired to forgive

But that wire has caught fire

I lit the match

You sparked the flame

The past is the past

I should just let it go

Your words and actions today

All sound the same

I am left in a seemingly endless cycle

Not stuck between wrong and right

More should I try to fix this?

It’s impossible when you see no wrong

Leaving me to take the blame

Most days I know I should walk away

Twenty eight years is a long time spent full of doubt and questions

I know all the answers

But my mind is still full of shame

I’m left here alone pacing and anxious

I can’t understand why I fight myself day after day

I shouldn’t care about this pointless pain

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